Why do birds suddenly appear
Every time you are near?
Just like me, they long to be
Close to you.
Why do stars fall down from the sky
Every time you walk by?
Just like me, they long to be
Close to you.
On the day that you were born
The angels got together
And decided to create a dream come true
So they sprinkled moon dust in your hair of gold
And starlight in your eyes of blue.
- The Carpenters
today was yet another fun day. carolling and carolling. gladys was sick again. ): she didnt join us in the practice. stayed for dinner. the whole place was quiet. only the clanging of the forks and spoons on the plates ! (: it felt so silent but yet i liked that quiet feel. it was probably then that i started to tone down. then all those horrible thoughts start rushing back into my head. i guess i really need the noise to block off all the problems. yes, running away yet again.
it's those problems that're coming back up again ): ive three people online who're talking to me. mummy ms ang cassandra. yes, ms ang just talked and i have no idea how we ended up talking about problems that we both are facing. that was random. the best part of it all is that mummy and ms ang actually echo each other. so it hits me twice, goes into my head and gets locked up there. -pokes.
i liked the 'resilience' talk that ms scully gave. i just love those very emotional talks ? those that go deep into how a person acts etc. that probably explains why i like talking to ms scully so much. she understands how we teenagers think and feel and can relate back to us. we all had to choose something that describes us. a symbol. i chose the glass. a glass looks so clear and nice on the outside. but it's still holding so much on the inside. there's always a limit to it's volume. it holds until it feels like it cant take anymore and everything just spills out of it. the glass is so fragile and so easily broken. yet many still want to have it (be like it). when there're many many cups around, the glass seems so transparent that people just can miss it. people just look through it. i guess it's really jus how i feel. sometimes so transparent. i'll keep holding everything inside. but yes, there's always a limit to it. gotta try to do what ms ang taught me to do.
if only that was possible huh. only if i can have the joy that no one can take away. only if that can ever happen. i wonder what it would be like.
ni hai hui ji de wo ma ?
let your heart out.